At this moment when Maura, Narcissus and The Other have an extended break from the world of academia, some of them are currently in towns that bespeak past memories, and in the case of Maura, maybe even past identities, which led her to wonder...if identity is not merely just composed of interactions with others...is it also composed of landscapes? And moreoever, can it be utterly dependent on interactions with certain others?
Currently, as Maura plans to pack up her traveling case to come visit the arid lands of her dear friend she has lately been heavily entrenched in the dry, crisp air, torrential downpours and sunny days that constitute the land in which she grew up. While entrenched in this land, thoughts of the past, and of past individuals with which she had seminal interactions, Maura has found herself missing her Jimmy, not merely for the more obvious reasons, but also because it seems as though living up to her best potential as an individual is greatly aided by Jimmy's presence.
When Maura left her seaside hometown (both the historical Maura and the metaphorical one), she left behind individuals who did not wish her absence. But with stubborn focus, Maura insisted until she realized and moved forward with a new adventure, leaving the town of Galway to the fishermen and their wives. Once she was settled in her new life and had established an independent but co-existent relationship with another, she realized how much the very presence of Jimmy, even a silent presence, was in fact necessary for her to speak sweet words and leave the self-encasing and self-prohibiting persona that can be her own skin. When she returned home for a brief stint, she also realized that the presence of some others from her small town seemed to bring her back to actions and thoughts that she seemed to have grown out of, and necessarily so since they brought moments of pain both to herself and others...yet they pulled at her, in an entirely different way than do the strings that tie us. These were more like the strings that bind us than the strings that lift us up, support us, or fling us into new possibilities.
Is it thus possible that our identities are not merely composed of interactions with others, but utterly dependent on this interactions? Once in her life, Maura would have certainly said, No, because for an identity to be strong and capable of withstanding turmoil, it must have some strength of its own. But clearly, it is all but ludicrous to deny this fact. Once these presences end, naturally or out of forced circumstances, does this identity crumble? Or does the skin go out and seek another one to depend on, in any manner of a relationship? It would seem that this is the case.
It seems natural and necessary that the absence of The Other and Narcissus from Maura's life would change Maura's own identity as well. Do we also depend on the absence of another to define our identity? Anyone who has experienced grave loss beyond the momentary lack of another in their life would probably assure Maura, that yes, this is the case. So these identities are a constantly fluxing, momentarily defined thing.
Oddly enough, all this talking about identity has made Maura give much less of a damn about the entire idea. Partially, because there are more important things to worry about with the Oirish tendency for worry, and partially because The Other, Narcissus and Maura need a new topic of philosophical musings for a bit. They can come back to this one later. Maura's fountain pen is getting a bit dry, so she is going to take a break for a bit. Signing off with sincerity - Ms. Barnacle.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Friday, December 5, 2008
Dark Corners of Potential
As we all know, the initial intention of this blog was to write the lives of the others. I know that dear Maura has broken from this goal in the last few posts, but given her current situatedness, she began to think about The Other & Narcissus. So she will turn her thoughts back to them...
Due to her itch to move about and settle somewhere with dark corners, barrels of tea, and enough quiet to allow the din of traditional music and her thoughts to meld together and float over her in a wonderful reverie, Ms. Maura has become a whore of coffee shops. She has visited so many that she is now becoming a bit familiar. She has sat in so many seats that she has regular seats in each one...that's a lot of seats.
But looking around, trying to avoid eye contact with the medieval text before her, she thought about what The Other & Narcissus are doing on a night in their respective lands. The sun was coming in on Ms. Maura's dirty locks, and she thought about what The Other & Narcissus would be doing if they were still in the Emerald City, facing the inevitable dust on historical and literary textbooks that arises when one tries to pull a thesis out of one's arse.
And she decided that what they must be up to...must be much better.
So here's what they better be doing.
To start with The Other...Last night, a wonderfully mysterious looking foreign guard knocked on her window to ask a question about the garbage can outside. In Shakespearean moment, this Stranger saw her emerald eyes and dark hair, like that of a mystical selkie, and decided that despite the fact that their countries were miles apart, and perhaps even at odds at times, he loved her. Reaching for her hand, he lifted her down from her window and decided that they must run away together, if only to a pub across town (since he had another shift the next morning, and well, he keeps the streets safe.) Fingering a brandy glass in his hands, he watched The Other's green eyes as they sat, silently in the dark corner of the pub. There was no need for the loud words that scorch The Other's soul, nor was there need for questions regarding The Other's supposed brick walls encasing her. The Stranger was actually a builder in a foreign life, and all who create things also know how to make them fall to pieces. With one look at The Other, he had crumbled her walls. After silent but perfectly attuned communication, The Other & The Stranger wandered through the streets, in a moment as pure as the snow on the ground. As he walked her back towards her apartment, he confessed that his mother was quite traditional, and that she required that his marriage be pre-arranged. The Other nodded and looked down at her big black boots. And so they agreed: both would convince the mother that in fact, they were meant to be and would not see each other until the marriage day in order to abide by the mother's wishes. So now, The Other sits in her room, pen posed above the page, waiting for the weighty words that befall her in moments of enlightenment, thinking of The Stranger and their fateful day.
Narcissus on the other hand...has found himself in the company of another, by slightly more manipulative ways. The company they share is virtual, as of yet, but will soon be corporal and shall I say, embodied. We'll just have to see how that plays out....manipulations don't get as much attention from Maura. She craves the mystery that her own Jimmy offered her. As well as the tension...She forsees that there might be tension for The Stranger and The Other...but sweet tension, troubled by doubt and sharpened by need.
Due to her itch to move about and settle somewhere with dark corners, barrels of tea, and enough quiet to allow the din of traditional music and her thoughts to meld together and float over her in a wonderful reverie, Ms. Maura has become a whore of coffee shops. She has visited so many that she is now becoming a bit familiar. She has sat in so many seats that she has regular seats in each one...that's a lot of seats.
But looking around, trying to avoid eye contact with the medieval text before her, she thought about what The Other & Narcissus are doing on a night in their respective lands. The sun was coming in on Ms. Maura's dirty locks, and she thought about what The Other & Narcissus would be doing if they were still in the Emerald City, facing the inevitable dust on historical and literary textbooks that arises when one tries to pull a thesis out of one's arse.
And she decided that what they must be up to...must be much better.
So here's what they better be doing.
To start with The Other...Last night, a wonderfully mysterious looking foreign guard knocked on her window to ask a question about the garbage can outside. In Shakespearean moment, this Stranger saw her emerald eyes and dark hair, like that of a mystical selkie, and decided that despite the fact that their countries were miles apart, and perhaps even at odds at times, he loved her. Reaching for her hand, he lifted her down from her window and decided that they must run away together, if only to a pub across town (since he had another shift the next morning, and well, he keeps the streets safe.) Fingering a brandy glass in his hands, he watched The Other's green eyes as they sat, silently in the dark corner of the pub. There was no need for the loud words that scorch The Other's soul, nor was there need for questions regarding The Other's supposed brick walls encasing her. The Stranger was actually a builder in a foreign life, and all who create things also know how to make them fall to pieces. With one look at The Other, he had crumbled her walls. After silent but perfectly attuned communication, The Other & The Stranger wandered through the streets, in a moment as pure as the snow on the ground. As he walked her back towards her apartment, he confessed that his mother was quite traditional, and that she required that his marriage be pre-arranged. The Other nodded and looked down at her big black boots. And so they agreed: both would convince the mother that in fact, they were meant to be and would not see each other until the marriage day in order to abide by the mother's wishes. So now, The Other sits in her room, pen posed above the page, waiting for the weighty words that befall her in moments of enlightenment, thinking of The Stranger and their fateful day.
Narcissus on the other hand...has found himself in the company of another, by slightly more manipulative ways. The company they share is virtual, as of yet, but will soon be corporal and shall I say, embodied. We'll just have to see how that plays out....manipulations don't get as much attention from Maura. She craves the mystery that her own Jimmy offered her. As well as the tension...She forsees that there might be tension for The Stranger and The Other...but sweet tension, troubled by doubt and sharpened by need.
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